There is a place I am longing to be, and although it is fairly new to me, I seem to know it well. I discovered it on accident, as I was searching for something or someone to believe in. While doing that, I was only barely aware of my surroundings. I realized upon finding this spot that I was also trying to escape something. It is still unclear if I have succeeded in evading whatever I was trying to get away from. This place is hard to get to but kind of difficult to leave once I find it. I never meant for it to be what I have made it, I never wanted it to become what it is. My Obsession.
I once tried to explain this place and promptly realized I have no words. I consider myself relatively coherent and at times mildly eloquent. I rarely find myself speechless or searching for the correct words to describe my surroundings. The day I tried to explain this place to Her, I could not. When I was approached by Him, I once more tried to describe it. When They had me explain it, They could not understand and tried to turn it into something else entirely. I have a theory, about why this place is so complicated to explain and how it represents different things to different people but, I am not here to discuss my theories.
I have altered things in this place and I am not sure who it belongs to, so I am afraid I am trespassing. I know I should not linger or escape to this place as often as I do, but I find I actually miss it when I am away. I know I live in a place that demands I remain ever vigilant and in the moment, but especially lately, I am mentally wandering to this highly desired locale, fully aware I am not there, yet unable to pull myself out of waking daydreams; as if in a trance and no longer in control of myself or mind.
Its getting harder to focus on other things, people, or living in the moment. Everything in me wants to go. Leave everything and everyone behind and get lost in the place I am desperately wanting to be.